Results tagged ‘ Janet Jackson Disease ’

We’re Going STREAKING!

yankees_250_052209.jpgNo, not through the quad Snoop-a-loop, through the Blue Jays, Twins and Orioles. It’s nine and counting and the defending champion Phillies stand in the way of the streak continuing. It should be a fun weekend of baseball in the Boogie Down. It’s the Phillies’ first trip back to the Bronx since 2000. They are 1-5 against the Yankees in New York and 8-10 overall.

Let’s get back to this current nine-game winning streak. You are all probably sick of me bringing this up. Probably even to the point of regurgitation. But even during a winning streak, something positive, people are still out on a ledge with this team in this area. You just can’t make it up. Janet Jackson Disease is still in the air. I don’t get it. Do the Yankees have to go 162-0 for everyone to just remain calm? Somehow I have a feeling if they did, someone, somewhere, would find a way to pooh pooh the perfection and nitpick about how they only won by a run in 50 of their games.

Believe it or not boys and girls, callers on radio shows in the greater New York area were calling up during the Twins series, and moaning and complaining because the Yankees were only winning the games by a run. Let me get this straight: Instead of just sitting back and enjoying a five-game winning streak at the time, you are going to sit on hold for at least an hour, finally get on the air, and this is what you’re bringing to the table? Is there any joy in any of your lives? Seriously. This area has a fever, and the only prescription isn’t more cowbell, it’s winning.

Well at least I thought it was. Now even though they are winning and getting good pitching and timely hitting, people still aren’t satisfied. Enough with the Debbie Downer attitudes, people. When times are good, you have to take your half empty glass, and make it half full. You have to turn the frown upside down or you will be taken in by a new strain. Oh yeah. A new one. I’m putting JJD on the backburner.

We all know swine flu is scaring the bejesus out of people, but I have discovered something far worse. Billy Joel Disease – “I Go to Extremes.” Here’s a refresher if you need it:

Sometimes I lie awake, night after night
Coming apart at the seams
Eager to please, ready to fight
Why do I go to extremes?

Darling I don’t know why I go to extremes
Too high or too low there ain’t no in-betweens
And if I stand or I fall
It’s all or nothing at all

You can’t get too high or too low with this team. Just stay at an even keel and everything will be fine. However, if you can’t, the doctor is always in discovering new afflictions and trying to come up with a cure.

We Want Torre?

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And you were worried about swine flu? I’d be more worried that JJD is spreading at an alarming rate and it affected all those in attendance at the Yankees’ latest loss to the Red Sox.

Fans were chanting, “We Want Torre?”

Really?! You really think this has to do with the manager? You really think Joba Chamberlain going out and giving up four runs in the first inning (even though he rebounded for a strong finish the damage was already done) had nothing to do with the Yankees latest loss? You really think Jorge Posada being on the DL had nothing to do with the Yankees latest loss? You really think not having A-Rod has nothing to do with the Yankees getting out to a mediocre start? You really think Chien-Ming Wang basically forgetting how to pitch has nothing to do with the Yankees and the position they’re in right now? You really think the bullpen instead of being a bridge to Mariano Rivera is The Bridge on the River Kwai after the explosion has nothing to do with the Yankees being 500 after 26 games? You really think Mark Teixeira’s slump, hitting out of the three hole, has nothing to do with the Yankees not being able to stay consistent? Really?!  

The Bombers are now 0-5 against their arch rivals (which is more fan driven now, the players are too huggy kissy for me these days). Their record matches the Munsters’ address number, 13-13, and there seems to be just a general malaise floating through the air.
 
And you know what that general malaise is called boys and girls. Yup I am going back to the well until its bone dry. You can all say it with me, Janet Jackson Disease.

While the only cure for Bruce Dickinson’s fever was more cowbell, the only cure for the spread of JJD is, quite simply, winning.

Seriously though people, you want Joe Torre back? The same Joe Torre most of you wanted out of here? The same Joe Torre that you were fed up and disgusted with? This is why the city of New York will always be single. It’s impossible to be in a relationship with this place. It falls out of love too damn fast.

No one is more prepared, and no one gives more attention to detail than Joe Girardi. Who, by the way, is a former Manager of the Year…with the Florida Marlins. Just chill out, we haven’t even played a quarter of the season yet and the Yankees haven’t had their full team on the field once.

For some comic relief and to ease your Yankees tension check this out it always makes me laugh…RIP Dom DeLuise.